GROWING IN CHRIST – A DEEPER INTIMACY.

We all have friends, and among them, our best friends, and some of us even have BFF’s! What’s the difference between these three groups?

It’s our level of intimacy, right? With our casual friends, we have a minimum of intimacy; with our good friends, a greater degree of intimacy; with our best friends, the deepest level of intimacy. It’s been said that a good friend will know the names of your parents, but a best friend will know their phone number! 

The greatest intimacy that we as human beings can experience with another human being is in the marital relationship of husband and wife. But there is a greater intimacy to discover even than this! An intimacy with our Creator GOD, our heavenly Father!

And what is intimacy anyway? We often think of intimacy in terms of a sexual relationship, and certainly that as a human being, that’s an important part, but not the most important part, certainly not the only part of intimacy.

Intimacy is “close familiarity or friendship; it is a closeness.” We can say that it’s even the endeavor as well as the experience of becoming one. Scripture talks about Adam and Eve, as husband and wife, becoming one (MATT 19:5) – it’s not that two persons become one person, but they become a single unit of two perfectly fitting parts, two parts that make up a whole.

Scripture also talks about the relationship between the LORD and the soul that’s become a child of GOD by the Holy Spirit:

1 CORINTHIANS 6:16-17
¹⁶ What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh. ¹⁷ But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit.

Paul here is admonishing the saints at the church in Corinth to practice righteousness and holiness, and as members of the body of Christ, we need to conduct ourselves in purity and honor – if we were to become intimate with a prostitute, it would be like joining that prostitute to the LORD Himself! How is that possible?
Vs. 17 says it: because we who are born again are joined to the LORD as one spirit; that is, our spirits are fused in the Spirit of the LORD Who inhabits our humble hearts as well as the heavens!

ISAIAH 57:15
For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones.

EPHESIANS 3:17
That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,

How’s that for intimacy? For closeness and oneness? Can you get any more intimate than to have another person, in this case, GOD Almighty, dwelling within your very own heart? If you are a child of GOD, born again of His Holy Spirit, then that’s you! GOD dwells in your heart!

So how is it that Christians don’t experience deep, satisfying and abiding intimacy with the LORD as we should be, seeing how He lives within our very own hearts?!

Imagine marrying a woman, and moving into a house together, and for years, decades even, you don’t talk to each other, you don’t share your hearts with one another, there is no expression of love or sacrifice: you’re living together, eating together, working together, sleeping together but there isn’t any relationship going on.
Will you know any level of intimacy? No!

Or let’s say there is some conversation happening, there is some level of sharing, the one partner expresses their heart to the other – then there will be some level of intimacy, but how deep will that go? And at such a level of intimacy, how strong will that relationship be?
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How many of you have read FOXE’s BOOK of MARTYRS? Or a more recent two volume series called ‘Jesus Freaks’ written by DC Talk And Voice of the Martyrs? I’ve read them all.

It’s a humbling experience to see such courage and faith among the saints who, in the face of agonizing torture and a certain, but slow death, stand fast for the LORD and not deny Him.

The late Richard Wurmbrand, the founder of Voice Of The Martyrs ministry was a prisoner of various Soviet satellite states like Romania off and on for a total of over twenty years. He suffered torture, near starvation, sickness, loneliness along with scores of other Christians who were arrested and imprisoned as enemies of the Soviet State – and none of them ever denied Jesus Christ. What was their secret?

Richard said, “When faced with persecution it won’t matter how much of the Bible you have memorized, or how correct your doctrine is, or anything else because those things won’t sustain you in such suffering. What will keep you strong, is the strength of your relationship with the LORD!”

Aside from the blessedness of experiencing intimacy with the LORD, which should be motive enough to learn what it takes to acquire this deep intimacy, I want to share this because I firmly believe that persecution is coming to America. And we need to be prepared!

 As men of GOD, we need to grow and deepen our intimate relationship with the LORD, to grow deep, deep roots so that as “trees of righteousness” we will be firmly planted in the LORD (PSALM 1:3), so that no storm of persecution or attack by the enemy will uproot us; so that we not only will survive such a time of suffering, but fully thrive in such a time of suffering! Church history is full of examples of the church flourishing during, sometimes, severe persecution!

Many of the men of GOD in the church past would spend more and more time with the LORD in prayer and worship, that after a while, they began to shun the company of men, preferring rather to bask in the presence of the LORD. This is not to say that we ought to neglect our family in Christ and focus all of our time and attention on the LORD; Scripture is very clear on this matter:

1 JOHN 4:19-21
¹⁹ We love him, because he first loved us. ²⁰ If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen? ²¹ And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also.

Paul experienced this dilemma personally:

PHILIPPIANS 1:23-24
23 For I am in a strait betwixt two, having a desire to depart, and to be with Christ; which is far better: 24 Nevertheless to abide in the flesh is more needful for you.

But to have a heart of such devotion, such love, such fervency, such loyalty, such desperate desire and longing for the LORD is what draws us deeper into His presence with reverential worship, and it’s in that place that we’ll the more effectively love our family in Christ.

Prayer is simply communicating with GOD, and no relationship can prosper without communication; in fact, if you want to destroy a relationship, you don’t have to do a thing: just stop communicating – that relationship will die.

How many times have you attended a prayer meeting, and the assembly there prayed for various needs of theirs and others, and once those needs were all listed, like reading off of a roster in front of a warehouse, and as soon as the LORD signs at the bottom line, we load up those items and just hop back in the truck without another word to our LORD Who longs for fellowship with us and we drive away, seeing Him sadly wave?

Seeking the blessing of the LORD isn’t wrong, nor are we wrong for praying for our needs, but I have found through the years that the greater blessing – no, the greatest blessing is not those things that the LORD provides for us, but the LORD Himself. To know Him, to fellowship with Him and embrace His precious, tender, holy heart!

You know how this is: your spouse or a dear friend gives you a gift; you’re blessed by that gift, absolutely! – but you love the giver far more than the gift! In fact, the only reason you love the gift the way that you do is because of the one that gives it to you! It means all the more because of the one who gave that gift to you! You could have purchased that item yourself, and you’d like to have it, but that’s empty compared to receiving that same item from a loved one!
But you know that this isn't the best; the best is not the gifts your loved ones give you, but the loved one themselves is the greatest gift!

Spend time in communing with the LORD, not just in petitions and requests, but in seeking GOD: asking Him, “LORD, what’s on Your heart today? What would You show me in Your Word today? Show me your face! I want to know you more! What would You have from me? How may I serve You?”

Ask Him: “LORD, where are You leading my life? What is there in my life You want me to get rid of? What do you desire to see grow in my life? In what way may I bring you honor, because I greatly desire to please You and thank You for all that you’ve done for me and in my life.”

Ask the LORD, “Allow Your nature, Your character, Your holy traits to grow in my life so that my Father will be honored to see Your likeness in me. Show me Your heart and Your thoughts towards me”

Communication is not very effective if it’s only one way – if we do all of the talking, and not allow the LORD to speak to us; and we know how He does this: through the Holy Spirit-inspired Word of GOD, which is a living Word and speaks to us today and to our lives just as its done from the days of Moses when the LORD inspired him to write “In the beginning . . .”

The LORD used His Word to show me, He wanted me to move from New York State to Arizona. Now, I can assure you, there is not one verse in the Bible that says,

“James, I want you to move to Arizona!” Yet, nevertheless, He got His message through, and when I asked for confirmation, He provided it. How did He do this? Because it’s a Living Book, and by it, the LORD can use it to speak to our situation, but you simply allow the LORD to speak in this manner in His time – and not play ‘Bible-bingo’: where you close your eyes, open your Bible, stick your finger in a random page and read where ever your finger lands!

Worship of GOD brings His presence, and in His presence, He is revealed – and that inspires us to worship Him all the more! And as we worship the LORD, we become more like the LORD! How does our worship reach the highest heights? By expressing your love to the LORD by following Him in obedience for His glory! To obey is better than any sacrifice (1 SAM 15:12)

Also, by regularly reading and studying this Book, you’re becoming familiar with the Author – because the Bible isn’t a text book full of factual information so much as a Love Letter, written personally to you, written in the blood of the LAMB of GOD Who gave His Life for you! Familiarity at its extreme is intimacy – you come to know the LORD as you become deeply familiar with what the Scriptures reveal about Him.

So, prayer, worship, the Word of GOD – what else is there that helps us become intimate with the LORD? How about serving in the ministry that He has called you to? And if you’re a Christian, GOD has a ministry for you – maybe not pastor, but a ministry nonetheless!

MATTHEW 11:28-30
²⁸ Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Imagine a carpenter allowing his little son helping him in a project that he’s working on in his garage. The boy fumbles and gets things wrong, slowing the father up, but the father persists patiently and teaches him how to work with the wood.

The father could have done a much better job without the boy and completed it in a fraction of the time. But by allowing the boy to work with him, he teaches his son how to get better at it; plus the main reason: to spend time with him, to share an experience together, to express his love for his boy.

When we labor together with the LORD (double yoked together with Him) we receive His wisdom, knowledge, instruction and so much more from Him as He teaches us; but we also have a shared experience together and we “learn of [Him]” – His meekness, His lowliness, the rest and the peace that can only come from Him.

When we serve our Father in the kingdom, we are never serving Him alone:

MARK 16:19-20
¹⁹ So then after the Lord had spoken unto them, he was received up into heaven, and sat on the right hand of God. ²⁰ And they [the disciples] went forth, and preached everywhere, the Lord working with them, and confirming the word with signs following. Amen.

So, we gain greater intimacy with the LORD as we spend quality time, extended time, time worthy of Him (“the first fruits” of our time) in prayer, in the Word, in fellowship and ministry with the LORD.

Neglect of these things prohibit intimacy, but that’s not all:

There are barriers that prohibit intimacy with the LORD:

Unforgiveness – do we harbor unforgiveness towards someone who offended us? Unforgiveness will prevent our intimacy with the LORD Who will have us get things right before we can draw closer to Him.

MARK 11:26
But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.

Bitterness – as a result of severe trials and hardships in life, opportunities that fell through, misfortune plaguing you and your loved ones – we must understand that no trial ever comes into our lives without the LORD’s say so, and if HE says so – then it must be so – because He has a plan and a purpose in such things that will mean His greatest glory and our ultimate good. Let us not be tempted to fall into bitterness but look with faith and hope to the LORD. The giving of thanks for all the good He has given, and still gives, and promises to give down the road is a sure cure-all for bitterness.

Distractions and busyness – Have you ever tried to have a meaningful conversation with someone who just won’t sit still? They remember that they have to do this and that, and constantly get up in the middle of your sharing your heart?
In your prayer time, do you remember you have to do this or that? Or does your mind constantly swing back and forth, from prayer to the LORD then to earthly matters that concerns your day? Do you wait until everything else is done in your day and save the last (few remaining minutes) if your day to pray?

Remember what busy Martha was told by the LORD Jesus regarding restful Mary:
LUKE 10:41-42
⁴¹ And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: ⁴² But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her.

Fear – If we aren’t as intimate with the LORD as we should be as His children, there can be a degree of uncertainty, even of fearfulness of what gaining such intimacy will mean. What if I get to know the heart of GOD in a deeper way and I find out what He intends for me is something I’d rather not experience? This is a tactic of the enemy that he uses to shoo the children of GOD away from our Abba Father.

To truly know the LORD is to love Him, and what does the Bible say about “perfect love”?

1 JOHN 4:18
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

The LORD Jesus experienced perfect love with the Father, all the while knowing where the Father was leading Him: up Calvary’s hill, there to be made an offering of sin for us (HEB 10:5-7).

Laziness – spiritually lazy Christians can expect nothing of intimacy with the living GOD; laziness and lukewarmness work hand in hand. There is nothing less than repentance from these things that the LORD requires of us. There is no such thing as a lazy athlete if a true athlete they are. The same with a soldier, or a farmer and Scripture compares the Christian to all three of these (1 COR 9:24-27; 2 TIM 2:3; JAMES 5:7).

Double-mindedness – It’s because we can either walk in the Spirit or walk in the flesh that we can sometimes act like a pendulum: we swing far right and really walking close with Christ and then swing far left and walk in the flesh. This leads to spiritual instability, and an inconsistent walk with the LORD, where you might know moments of intimacy, but then it vanishes away as we start getting into the flesh once again.

JAMES 1:8 

A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.

JAMES 4:7-10
⁷ Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. ⁸ Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded. ⁹ Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep: let your laughter be turned to mourning, and your joy to heaviness. ¹⁰ Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall lift you up.

Lot’s wife was double-minded; she was following Lot out of Sodom and Gomora but she also turned back – and look what happened! The nation of Israel was double-minded, wanting to serve the LORD, but also serve the idols of the pagan nations, and look at the way GOD judged them! Let us pray like David:

PSALM 86:10-12 

10 For thou art great, and doest wondrous things: thou art God alone. 11 Teach me thy way, O Lord; I will walk in thy truth: unite my heart to fear thy name. 12 I will praise thee, O Lord my God, with all my heart: and I will glorify thy name for evermore.

Idolatry – This goes along with being double-minded; what grabs our attention during our daily routine, what gets our focus and our time and our passion? Compare that with the attention, the focus, the time and passion you have for the LORD. How do these compare?

If there is anything in your life, beyond necessaries like your job and caring for your family, that takes more of your focus, your time, your passion than the LORD does, it’s an idol and needs to be struck down. GOD’s love for us is so all-consuming that anything less than this kind of love from us towards GOD will result in a limited intimacy.

Idolatry is a work of the flesh (GAL 5:20), and something we should flee from where ever it may be seen in our lives (1 COR 10:13-15); to covet is idolatry (COL 3:5) “we should banish our desires for whatever does not belong to us. Never having enough money is regarded as a symptom of the love of money. Obedience to the tenth commandment requires that envy be banished from the human heart”

Strongholds of sin – we have weak areas in our lives where we are prone to sin; some struggle with sexual issues, others with drug addiction, others with gambling or gossip – these things, if unrepentant of and repeated regularly become entrenched in our lives; we get stuck in the trap of these sinful habits and this will prevent intimacy with the LORD. These strongholds take intense prayer and sowing the good seed of GOD’s Word, and a heart of repentance that remains consistent until holy habits replace sinful habits.
Once these strongholds are “cast down” (2 COR 10:4) the barrier to intimacy with the LORD is removed and we are blessed!

May we hunger for the LORD with earnest desire, and if you lack such a desire, ask the LORD to grant you this desire, to fan the flame of the Spirit Who dwells in you; may our souls pant after Him as the thirsty deer pants for the streams of refreshing water!

PSALM 42:1-3
¹ As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God. ² My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God?

           For more about this check out this youtube video with Dr. Tony Evans on: 

INTIMACY With GOD.

Note: TTUF does not necessarily agree with all the assertions and statements made by Dr. Evans in this video nor do we endorse everything that is taught at Oak Cliff Bible Fellowship where he pastors.

QUESTIONS TO THINK ABOUT MY INTIMACY WITH THE LORD:

1) Do I know Jesus as my personal Friend as well as LORD and Savior? Do I understand that the LORD considers me to be His friend (JOHN 15:15)? How can I make my friendship with the LORD better?

2) Where ever I go through my day, I am bringing the LORD with me, because He lives inside my heart; are there places I go, things I do, words that I say and thoughts I think that hurt or offend His Holy heart? 

3) Am I prepared for hard times in my life – personal hardships, problems that burden my family like financial difficulties or serious illness, persecution in the church – by having a strong and intimate relationship with the LORD?

4) Does my time in the Word, in prayer, worship and fellowship with the LORD and ministry show that I have a deep intimacy with the LORD?

5) What barriers in my life are preventing me from gaining a deeper intimacy with the LORD?